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The Ballad of a Mean Cavan Hoor

by Brendan Melia

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A humorous commentary on the legendary thriftiness of Cavan men

lyrics

There's beautiful country up around Kilnaleck,

But the smell of the compost

Would make your dog sick

It hangs in the air

And perfumes your clothes

For a tenner they’ll rent you a peg for your nose

I tell ya hai!... It’s for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor



In Ballyjamesduff on the hill you will find

They’ve erected a rather large wind turbine

Hoping the light bill is easier paid

As the height of this yoke

Is a terror to see

I tell ya hai!... it’s for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor


Up In Cavan town a protest did start

Against Irish water

and their water charge

The sergeant out of the window remarked

we’ll start a collection

and scatter the march

I tell ya hai!... itst’s for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean cavan hoor


Now the Cavan shopkeeper’s

We’ve heard of before

He charge you a toll

For crossing the door

But anything goes

With a schilling to make

He’d sell you cat shite

And call it sweet cake

I tell ya hai!... it's for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor



Now christmas in cavan’s

A terrible pass

The auld fella’d take you down

To the church yard

Not to pray for the dead

Their souls for to save

But to show the poor childeren

Santa Claus’s grave

I tell ya hai!... it’s for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor


On a Sunday a good Cavan man goes to mass

The priest on the altar

A chalice he’ll pass

Along the front row

The faithful to find

But they’re not even christian

They want the free wine

I tell ya hai!... itst’s for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor




Down in Virginia

on the border with Meath

The locals are all a peculiar breed

but with the Jones’s

They cannot keep up

Because all They want

Is the Sam Maguire cup

I tell ya hai!... it's for sure

There’s no one as cute as a mean Cavan hoor

And none are as cute as a mean Cavan hoor

credits

released August 26, 2022
Brendan Melia .... Guitar, Vocal
Brian Kelly .... Banjo

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all rights reserved

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Brendan Melia County Meath, Ireland

Folksinger/songwriter Based in rural Co Meath.
Music has always been a passion for me, between singing in pub sessions in the 80s to now gigging and recording music as a profession. It's been a sometimes torturous journey, but music has always been my friend. Even when I was alone, I was never truly alone. It's food and medicine for your soul. ... more

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